In a recent episode of the beloved talk show, David Letterman had the opportunity to fulfill a lifelong dream – to milk a cow. The talk show host expressed his excitement and noted that he hadn’t spent much time with cows before, but was eager to learn.
Joy, a 12,200 lb Holstein cow, was brought onto the set for Letterman to get a closer look. Joy’s owner, Carol Garner, shared that they were from Kisco, New York, which is near Albany. Garner also revealed that they owned a dairy farm and Joy was a Holstein cow who was six years old. Holstein cows can live up to 12 years and Joy probably weighed between 1,200 and 1,500 lbs.
Letterman was curious about the amount of milk Joy could produce in a year. Garner informed him that Joy could produce approximately 16,000 lbs of milk, which is equivalent to about 8 tons. She explained that they no longer milk cows by hand, but instead use milking machines and a pipeline to transport the milk from the cow to the dairy.
With Joy by his side, Letterman observed the electrical milking device but jokingly asked if it was used at parties. Garner explained that the device was used during the milking process to help them gather the milk effectively.
Letterman also inquired about the notable features of a Holstein cow, particularly the appearance of their hindquarters. Garner mentioned that the appearance of Joy’s hindquarters was normal for a Holstein cow and that characteristics like good body and udder depth contribute to their overall feminine appearance.
Curious about cow behavior, Letterman asked if cows were smart. Garner replied that cows could be smart when you didn’t want them to be and dumb when you wanted them to be smart, giving an example of jumping fences when they shouldn’t and refusing to come when called.
As the moment arrived for Letterman to try his hand at milking the cow, Garner demonstrated the process. She advised him to start by touching Joy on her flank to signal his approach. With a bucket ready, Letterman took hold of Joy’s udder and began to squeeze, successfully producing milk. Garner noted that with enough practice, milking a cow could be done in about three minutes.
Throughout the experience, Letterman expressed his enjoyment and found the process therapeutic. He revealed that if they were still milking by hand, the milk would go into milk cans, then to the milk plant for refrigeration, straining, pasteurization, homogenization, and bottling.
Impressed by his milking skills, Letterman thanked Garner and Joy for the experience, saying that it was a lot of fun. As the segment concluded, Letterman promised to be back with more entertaining content for his viewers.
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