In a recent episode of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, viewers were treated to an evening of laughter, celebrity interviews, and bizarre news stories. Host Stephen Colbert kicked off the show with his trademark energy, introducing the audience to the talented Louis KO, the show’s band, and teasing the upcoming appearances of actor Jeremy Allen White and director Ava DuVernay.

As always, Colbert humorously highlighted his role as the purveyor of news and humor, jokingly describing his nightly monologue as a grand spectacle. However, he also revealed that occasionally he strays from this polished routine, crashing an ATV into a garbage pit and sealing cracks with a peculiar DIY paste made from drywall and grape Shasta. These quirky anecdotes only serve to enhance Colbert’s relatability and entertaining persona.

Moving on to the “meanwhile” segment, Colbert delved into a series of peculiar news items. Subway, the popular sandwich chain, made headlines with their plan to add flatbread rolled up with pepperoni and cheese to their menu. This grab-and-go option is perfect for customers looking for convenience and portability. Not to be outdone, Jersey Mike’s announced their own version: a pocket full of tuna salad, ensuring customers will always have their favorite snack close at hand.

For fans of the Mountain Dew energy drink, exciting news emerged with the announcement of three new flavors inspired by America. Star Spangled Splash, Freedom Fusion, and Liberty Chill promise to offer a patriotic twist to the beverage. Colbert playfully commented on the vague blue hue of Liberty Chill, adding an element of whimsy to the discussion.

Switching gears to Germany, Colbert shared a surprising story of a town voting to exterminate its population of 700 pigeons. In an elaborate process involving a falconer luring the birds into a trap and stunning them with a wooden stick, the authorities aimed to control the pigeon population. Colbert couldn’t help but inject some humor into this unusual method, highlighting the quiet and mysterious falconer named Gunter.

Bringing the discussion back to the United States, Colbert shared an amusing summer camp opportunity for children. For just $35, parents can send their kids to a Chick-fil-A summer camp in Louisiana, where attendees will learn various tasks such as taking orders and developing customer service skills. Colbert playfully remarked that what child wouldn’t want to spend their summer doing free menial labor while enjoying the fast-food experience.

A surprising study revealed a seemingly unrelated connection: men who are happy with their penis size are more likely to own a gun. Colbert couldn’t help but poke fun at this correlation, jokingly questioning respondents’ honesty regarding their feelings about their masculinity. While the study’s findings may raise eyebrows, Colbert’s lighthearted approach injects humor into a potentially controversial subject.

Delving into the realm of biblical discovery, Colbert shared the intriguing news of the Infancy Gospel of Thomas, an ancient manuscript that sheds light on Jesus’ childhood. Colbert jokingly cited an account in which the Virgin Mary hands Jesus a Pop-Tart, playfully imagining the young Jesus expressing his preference for bananas. This witty retelling showcases Colbert’s ability to seamlessly blend humor with historical and religious references.

Lastly, Colbert amusingly reported that a boater in Florida stumbled upon a million dollars’ worth of cocaine floating in the Florida Keys, packaged with images of bald eagles. Colbert humorously quipped that the brick of cocaine with a bald eagle imprint is now the official state flag of Florida, ending the segment on an unexpected note.

As always, The Late Show with Stephen Colbert delivered a mix of laughter, entertainment, and unusual news. Colbert’s knack for humor and engaging storytelling kept viewers entertained throughout the episode, proving why the talk show continues to captivate audiences night after night.