On October 23rd, 1974, The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson aired a special episode to celebrate Johnny Carson‘s birthday. The monologue from that episode was filled with Johnny’s trademark wit and humor, keeping the audience entertained throughout the night.

Johnny started off the monologue by acknowledging the audience’s applause and thanking them for being there. He jokingly mentioned that someone always has to remind him of his age, but he still sounds great. He then went on to talk about how mean the audience was the previous night, referring to them as the kind of group that would slip cholesterol into his arteries.

Johnny revealed that it happened to be his birthday that day, and he jokingly mentioned the reason why the post office and banks were closed was in honor of his birthday. He humorously added that he wanted to get on Rockefeller’s gift list, hoping that Rockefeller watches the show.

Amid the laughter, Johnny made a playful remark, saying he doesn’t count his birthdays anymore and that he doesn’t feel a day over 21. He reminisced about fond memories of birthdays as a kid, recalling his sixth birthday when his parents rented a pony for him to ride. He humorously mentioned that it was the same pony they had rented for Tommy’s Newsome’s last birthday.

Moving on, Johnny brought up the topic of trading in the entertainment industry and revealed that he had received an offer to trade himself to Griffin for $100,000 in cash and five wines to be named at a future date. The audience burst into laughter, enjoying Johnny’s playful banter.

Johnny then shifted gears and discussed current events. He mentioned that the Olympic Games had gone to Moscow, causing a setback in the wheat deal. He also commented on a speech by Secretary of the Treasury Simon, who claimed that the country was not in a recession. Johnny added a humorous twist by mentioning the long lines at the unemployment office and sarcastically suggesting that people ask the individuals there if the country is in a recession.

Bringing a touch of political humor into the monologue, Johnny referred to Earl Butz, a prominent figure at that time. He jokingly said that Earl Butz claimed the cost of beef would not go any higher, but people had started finding bones in their hamburger helper due to the high price of meat.

Johnny continued with his comedic observations, mentioning how high the cost of living had become. He joked about a lumber yard catching Gibbons trying to steal enough sawdust for a casserole, keeping the audience laughing.

In true Johnny Carson style, he couldn’t resist sharing some celebrity gossip. He remarked on Mickey Rooney‘s seventh divorce, playfully implying that Rooney wasn’t cut out for marriage. Johnny entertained the audience by recounting an incident where the groom on top of the cake beat up the groom himself at one of Rooney’s wedding receptions.

Shifting to lighter topics, Johnny mentioned the upcoming wedding of Happy Rockefeller’s spinster aunt, who was 77 years old. In a humorous twist, she was marrying a 29-year-old butler because she always wanted children. Johnny joked that it would be a tiny wedding with only the immediate Night Nurse in attendance.

To wrap up his monologue, Johnny teased the exciting lineup for the night’s show. He mentioned that Buddy Hackett, Lana Contell, and Mike Preminger would be joining them, as well as the president of the third largest railroad in the country, Prime Osbor III. When asked if there were any questions, Johnny humorously replied, “Shut up’ll be right.”

Johnny Carson‘s birthday monologue on October 23rd, 1974, was a testament to his comedic genius and ability to keep audiences entertained. His sharp wit and playful banter made The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson a must-watch talk show during its time.

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